Life Lately // Bloggy Brunch

I feel like it's been forever since I've just sat down and written.  I try not to do it, because then instead of a clearly written post with some legitimate points and goals, you get essentially a long-winded Facebook status and who wants that? Nobody.  I do have a post to write about visiting the Home of Truth, so maybe I will work on that next time.

Other than that, I haven't had so much to say.  In this hilariously politically charged month, I've been so disgusted with social media (and everything really) that I've kept it all to a minimum, and my mouth shut.  I'm neither the person to wallow in misery and write out my fears about the world on my blog, though I have them--I always have them--and I'm not the person to take a political soap box and preach about my point of view.  Maybe in the past, but I'm too old now.

So I just observe, and stay quiet, and wait for spring.

I am done with winter.  After the crash that happened on Christmas, I pretty much got the wind knocked out of me and though I'm not going to complain about how great the snow is, I am terrified of it.  I have flashbacks of that night.  I still cry and feel like I failed a man and his family, I think about everything often and it's not something I can discuss or process or handle.  I know I should see my therapist, but honestly I've been too exhausted.  I haven't been taking care of myself beyond the basics.

Some days I feel like I'm slipping into depression, because I get a taste of it--those of you who suffer will understand.   You're going around being all melancholy and then it hits you like a train, and paralyzes you.  It's like instant drowning, and all you can do is say, "whoa, okay, time to tread water? What's happening?" For whatever reason, these 'waves' have all been extremely short-lived and leave me sitting here thankful that it's over...for the moment.

What else am I missing?  I'm tired.  I'm sad.  I'm done with winter, and I want it to be spring.  I HAD a lot of fun activities planned for the summer, but my coworker decided he doesn't want to change his schedule because of some class he's taking, so that kind of put a wrench in every single thing that I wanted to do in spring/summer.  I do still have things to look forward to, and if I were less cranky I probably could put a positive spin on it, but that's not my strong suit.

See?  Who wants to read this drivel?  ON ANOTHER NOTE---BATES MOTEL'S FINAL SEASON!!!!  This show is utterly amazing and captivating.  Some stellar acting.  Magnificent writing.  Everything that my tacky, obnoxious shows get wrong (American Horror Story, Vampire Diaries....) Bates Motel gets right, and THEN some.  It's the only show I don't watch spoilers for, because I want the full element of surprise.  Anyway, the final season starts in February and I've been watching the older seasons...this will make the third time, haha....so that Allyn can get caught up with me and Derik and we can bask in the glory of Norman Bates' insanity together.


1 comment :

  1. Keep your head up! Glad you are okay. Spring will be here before you know it!