3.12.2014

A Letter To Younger Me.

Is this self love year or something? I feel like a lot of posts have been about...well, me.  And then I'm like, no Alex, that's what people who actually like themselves do.  Invest in/talk about/nurture/etc themselves.  So here's just more proof that last year was a success themewise.  I love loving myself.

I saw this challenge over on Night Owl Venting (which is a perfect name by the way) and they have a few options, so don't worry if writing a letter to your younger self isn't your thing.  Go check it out!!  Also, I opted to write to ten year old Alex, because well...I was young then.  I guess I didn't overthink it.




Dear Little Alex,

 This letter is a sad thing to write, because I know you've already been through more than a ten year old should handle, and because I have to tell you that the roughest patches are still ahead.  As I write this though, I'm almost to thirty and I can say with confidence, despite everything, you will have a beautiful, enviable adulthood.  You will see and do amazing things and you'll actually be amazing things.  So if for nothing else, hang in there because you know the future is worth it.  I know you already know that.

You'll get a lot of advice over the years and most of it is pretty okay--or at least written with good intentions.  However, I want to highlight some of the important ones, ones that will resonate with you when you hear them.  

1.)  Be yourself and never give up.  Being yourself is going to be tough enough, without the complicated things you'll do like questioning your faith and beliefs, and whether or not you should live with Mom and Dad, because they are unhealthy to be around.  It would be a lot easier to give in, to do what others want and expect, and to take things laying down.  But you are a Worley.  You are the best at being a Worley.  Hold onto you, at all costs.  The spoiler alert is that you will do this and though it'll piss a fair amount of people off, you will look back on your life and be glad you did it.

2.)  Question everydamnthing.  I know you already do.  And living where you are, you're not in much capacity to question things.  It's typically frowned upon in that area.  Do that shit anyway.  A lot of your future happiness depends on you scouring things for their truth.  Stick with science.  I know you love it--hell yeah!  

3.)  Read. Write. Paint.  People keep telling you that these things aren't worthwhile.  Dad has already ripped up your awesome story.  You know what, Dad is an asshole shithead.  Do not ever let his ridiculous, babyish actions determine whether or not you pursue a hobby.  For god's sake, write.  Believe in yourself.  Through the years, tons of other people will.  And they will love your work, all of it.  So, stick with it.   

That's all the advice I have, but I wanted to tell you something very important about your family.  You have a big, wide open family full of strangers.  You may feel obligated to get to know them, to seek their approval.  Don't.  Extended family can be a little pointless.  As far as Mom and Dad go, try your best to be on good terms with them.  They won't always want that, but try.  Always try.  Don't let them ruin you, don't let them spoil your happiness, but reach out to them during your adventures.  Don't bother fighting or arguing.  It's up to you to find the balance of which you communicate with your family and sometimes you will be disappointed, or heartbroken.  Just know, it's not your fault.  All you can do is try. 

You're ten, which means Ariel is five, so you're probably just jealous of all the attention she's getting right now.  That's fine.  You two will be partners in crime for awhile longer, and cherish those moments.  Being a big sister is one of the defining parts of your personality.  In the future, you'll have about a million fights, but she is the one person who understands what you grew up with.  Nobody else on earth will ever understand that.  So, she's special.  And she loves you a ton, even if she doesn't show it sometimes.  Try to avoid punching her, if you can help it. 

Last but not least, I have good news.  Your one true love is tall, dark, and handsome, with big puppy dog brown eyes and he takes care of your pet crab while you're gone.  He's patient and kind and will teach you all about the kind of person you want to be in your adult life.  But don't worry about that now....focus on surviving, and then thriving, and you'll be okay. 

Life is a lonely place, and you'll feel lonely a lot (most of the time actually) but you always have yourself.  You have me.  And I love you.

2 comments :

  1. Here's mine from years ago - http://66.147.244.182/~shebecam/2013/04/20/oldies-but-goodies-5-letters-to-my-younger-selves/

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  2. Hey! There are new new April topics if you'd like to link up again :) http://iammrsk.blogspot.fi/2014/04/i-challenge-you.html

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