5.14.2013

You Are Not Alone.

Random music sharing, sometimes it happens.  Only when I come across something profound though.  And even if I don't touch on why the song means so much, trust that if I am open enough to post some music on this public blog, it means a lot and/or accompanies a feeling of epiphany or at least calmness in the calamity.

"All alone.  Whether you like it or not, alone is something you'll be quite a lot."  

As I'm sure many people, especially independent people and those who come from broken homes, can relate to, aloneness has a sort of bittersweet feel to it.  We are born alone and die alone and sometimes it feels like all we will ever be is alone, even in the middle of a group of people.  And yet, the fact that we succeed and do things on our own is liberating.  It can also be devastating, like the time I had a college choir concert that I was so happy about, and no one attended for me.  My choir mates had proud parents and groups of friends.  I had no one in the audience.  I sang alone.

Also, I'm an atheist.  There's a whole world of aloneness that atheists have that religious people don't ever get to feel.  It really is a phenomenal void, one that I can't even explain to theists and one that every atheist could probably nod their head in agreement with.  And I for one am irrevocably thankful for that aloneness.  It's taught me so much about my own intentions as well as the intentions of the world and mankind at large.  Problems and happy memories take on so much more meaning when you are not the daughter of some cosmic being playing puppeteer.

I've actually posted about feeling alone before on this blog, and usually when I'm feeling sad and lonely in my aloneness.  It happened more frequently with the onset of my depression, and there's nothing to do when you're lonely but write.  When I heard this song, something occurred to me.  At the moment, I am not alone. I haven't felt alone in awhile.




I think the thing I like about this music is that it's very happy while still having that undertone of vulnerability.  It's saying that you're not alone, but it may not always be that way.  In other words, you are not alone right now.  The song is also playful while being serious and having a deeper meaning--which is pretty much how I view life, and maybe even how some people would describe me.

Anyway, the point is, I know how it feels to be utterly and completely alone, and I know that sometimes it isn't that way, and both are important to feel to live a well-rounded life.   And I am so thankful for the awesome people in my life and the awesome readers I have who make me realize I Am Not Alone!


4 comments :

  1. I really could relate to this. I relish in alone time, I need it to think, to think, to recharge, but sometimes it can be really lonely.

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  2. You're right. I think that without ever feeling truly alone at some point in your life you can't really appreciate the times when you're not alone. Perspective through experience is always a good thing.

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  3. I love that you describe atheism as a phenomenal void. I've never heard it put that way and it made me think of it in a new light. Loves!

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  4. It's not necessarily like this music, but you may like the music on The Thoughts Room page. I can't find the original composer though...I know it was on their someone! Anyways, go listen. http://thequietplaceproject.com/thethoughtsroom/

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